Tuesday, 22 May 2012

I chose pimples over death

Mangoes and I have had a love-hate relationship for the past few years, in the sense that I love them with all my heart and they seem to hate me from the very centre of their ripe core because every time I eat even a slice, my face showcases at least one pimple within 24 hours. When I realised that that was what mangoes were doing to me, we had a heated argument where I yelled that I loved them so much and they seemed to hate me which was ungrateful and soooo not the way to return someone's love. 

 After a lot of jibber-jabber, as a compromise, they agreed to spare me from the pimple attack if I agreed to soak them in water overnight so they could turn the heat down (so to speak!) That seemed fair to me. It was better for our relationship if the heat was turned down a little bit. 

But last night, things changed.

My mother got loads of mangoes when she returned from work in the evening and my sister and I started eying them with mouth-watering lust (and it's not an exaggeration!) Unfortunately for my sister, she wasn't feeling too well and didn't want to risk eating mangoes and worsen her already itchy-scratchy throat. That was good for me; one person less to share the mangoes with. But I suddenly realised that I couldn't eat them either without soaking them in water because that would be a violation of our agreement.

To ensure that that didn’t happen, I did something I had never done before. I asked my mother to swear upon me that she would not cut a mango if I couldn’t eat.  And I had meant it.

She went on with her work and I assumed that she had agreed because she did not rubbish my statement, but then she also did the most shocking thing! While we were getting ready to eat, I saw three things in her hand that I didn’t want to see that night, especially when they were there together - a mango, a plate and a KNIFE!!! Yikes!

“Amma, I had asked you not to do that!! Do you want me to die???” I immediately reminded her.

She gave me a look that suggested she was thinking, Is she really 25?

Once the ‘glance’ was thrown at me, she went on to slice the mango. At that precise moment, Dexter was preparing to slice Travis Marshall (the Doomsday Killer) and I couldn’t help screaming inside my head picturing my own death because my mother broke a promise, something that was sworn upon her child!

A mango was cut last night and someone was going to eat it. The promise would be broken only if I was deprived of the mango. But eating it would pose other problems!!

I had to think quickly and make a decision - whether I wanted to die at a young age of 25 or subject my face to pimples when I might be getting married soon? It was a tough decision, probably the hardest one I had to make since I had to decide whether I wanted to have tea in the small cup or the large cup that evening, but clearly, this was the more important one. It was a matter of life and death after all.

Then I thought, well, with pimples at least I would be able to have a wedding!

So I chose pimples over death! The things a girl has to do for her wedding!! :P

6 comments:

  1. lol!!! ROFL.... u a re a nut.... a super cute nut!

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  2. This was so funny! I, too, would choose a pimple over death, if I had to. When we went to visit my husband's family in the North of Brazil, they had mango trees out in the fields. Whenever we wanted a mango, we'd just go out and use a stick thing to grab one. My daughter, who was four at the time, was covered with mango juice pretty much the whole time! They are so amazingly good fresh off the tree.

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    1. I know!!! They're like guilty pleasure for me... Glad you enjoyed the post!!! :)

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  3. That's what concealer is for!!! Pimples over death for sure....
    http://lgoogoogaga.wordpress.com/2012/08/19/dear-potential-employer/

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    1. I know, but still... I will know that the pimple is there.. The long term plan is to have blemish-free skin... But yes, when it comes to choosing between THAT and death, you know what did.. :)

      And thanks for the link to your post.. Read it, laughed a lot, loved it!! :)

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